Muleisms

"The details are the design."

"Craft is caring about the parts nobody will notice."

"Timeless beats trendy, except when it doesn't."

"By the time it's trending, it's ending."

"Data tells what. Observation tells why."

"The insight is in what they didn't say."

"Good strategy says no more than yes."

"The best strategy fits on a napkin."

"Strategy is what's left after removing everything unnecessary."

"Done and delivered beats perfect and promised."

"Overthinking is underthinking in a loop."

"The best work happens in the margins."

"Good clients buy solutions. Great clients buy trust."

"Price is what's paid. Value is what's no longer needed."

"The work that matters wasn't trying to matter."

"Every original idea is two old ideas meeting."

"Creativity is stubbornness with better PR."

"Algorithms love what humans already wanted."

"Post only what would stop a scroll."

"Authenticity rewarded and punished equally."

"Imagination outperforms adjectives."

"Promise Tuesday, not Christmas."

"The ad that works makes people forget it's advertising."

"Paid for being useful, not right."

"Yes to the problem, maybe to the solution."

"The worst idea contains the best insight."

"Present three: expected, preferred, surprising."

"Creative reviews test confidence, not creative."

"Most briefs are three briefs pretending to be one."

"White space is confidence with nothing to prove."

"Simple enough that adding anything would be vulgar."

"The design that lasts already looks ten years old, in the best way."

"Consistency builds trust. Surprise maintains interest."

"The story told when no one's there to correct it."

"Brands often die from improvement."

"Every brand is what it does on Tuesday."

"The headline that works is the one that sounds like someone talking."

"Write it wrong first. Wrong with confidence."

"Truth needs fewer words than fiction."

"The sentence that gets cut is the one most loved."

"Everything builds on everything."

"Ideas arrive when looking elsewhere."

"Starting with what irritates often produces wonders."

"A good line feels true before it sounds right."

"A headline should be like love at first sight—felt before it's understood."

"First, find the truth that stood the test of time, Then shape the brand to fit within that rhyme. Let tech and trends serve only as the thread, To weave the tale already in their head."

"An ad built on trends will age like milk. An ad built on truth will age like wine."

"CSR: When you want to do good, do good. Don't sell."

"A trend goes viral, fresh and cool, Then brands rush in—oh, what a fool! By launch, it's dead, the hype is through… Congrats, your ad just aged on cue."

"If a trend has reached you, it's probably already not a trend."

"The Mules who matter, don't (Thought Leadership)."

"They care about your 'exciting partnership' just as much as their likes excite you."

"Hello stalker."

"People trust strangers on the internet more than they do copywriters."

"If you torture the numbers long enough, they'll confess anything."

"You paid to interrupt someone's relaxation. Well done."

"Guerilla Marketing Budget should be an oxymoron."

"The more it looks like trash, the more sustainable it is."

"The budget is often directly proportional to forgetability."

"A mule in a rock concert is an invisible mule."

"Brand Mascots are either legendary or embarrassing—there's no in-between."

"We'll leverage synergies, pivot with speed, Optimize pipelines for scalable need. Harness deep insights from AI's embrace… Or, hear me out—just talk like a normal damn place."

"Let's activate seamless consumer delight, Through AI-led funnels and data insight. Maximize touchpoints, disrupt and expand… Or maybe just say what you actually planned."

"On Advertising Jargon: If the discussion veers towards "omnichannel synergy", change the subject."

"On Video Ads: If you don't hook them in three seconds, you just made a short film."

"A workshop births a spark both bold and new, Then kills it off by vote from all the crew. The safest choice will always win the day— And that is why your brand just screams 'okay.'"

"The mules now talk like humans—what a feat! While we just scroll and struggle to compete. If this keeps up, I swear in just a year, We'll work for bots and call them 'sir' and 'dear'!"

"Too long a brief? Already off script. By the time it's read (if it gets read!) The project's a crypt."

"Dear [First Name], your AI-driven email is garbage."

"Everyone knows the fake ones. Most have used them sometimes."

"On Stock Photos: Nothing says "authentic" like the same smiling people from every other ad."

"Exactly what it has been for the past 5,000 years."

"A horse sold once at the price of a mule will never again be bought at the price of a horse."

"Price is inversely proportional to explanation."

"If every mule wins, no mule wins."

"If everyone's SEO succeeds, no one's SEO does."

"If you write for Google, expect Google to be your only reader."

"Is it 'here is your cappuccino', or is it more like 'which size? would you want a sweetener? Natural or synthetic? How about some hazelnut syrup? Should I put some whipped cream over it? How much? Which bean would that be? Africa, argentina, or Brazil? Where in Africa? Rain fed, or river fed?....""

"On Customer Loyalty: A plastic rectangle won't make them love a mule."

"The more I teach my Mule to behave, the more ways it finds to be original."

"The more rules you make, the more ways your brand will find to break them."

"The only thing harder than making rules is following them."

"If you make it, it is an ad; if they do, it is content."

"A dull ad fails, no matter times it's played, For noise can't mask what's poorly thought and made."

"If your ad doesn't leave an impression the first time, it won't on the hundredth viewing either."

"If everyone is singing, try speaking."

"Nobody wakes up wanting to buy from a "magician.""

"More the buzzwords, the less the believability."

"A loud CTA? Sure, if your audience is dumb. Otherwise, trust them—if it's worth it, they'll act."

"If your message is longer than a sneeze, rewrite."

"Say it in a sentence, they won't remember your essay anyway."

"Give them hope, or give them laugh....or they don't read your ads."

"Print readers finish what they start reading."

"People who are still reading are a more defined target than Social Media scrollers, and probably have more money too."

"They buy in thrill, then reason through the cost, A tale well-spun to prove no cash was lost. So sell the spark, the dream, the grand delight— Then toss some facts to make it feel all right."

"YouTube Ads, the shortest route to consumer hate."

"Precisely targeted carpet bombing."

"Likes do not feed the Mule."

"The only way to guarantee likes is to post a baby or a dog."

"On Clickbait: If you promise them Arabian horses, expect them to leave when they find a Mule."

"On Clickbait: If you promise them the moon, expect them to leave when they find a rock."

"Virality is like a stubborn mule—it kicks when you least expect it and never when you want it to."

"A mule thought, 'Shiny stripes are my way! I'll dazzle, I'll steal the display!' But the world simply stared, Then walked off unimpaired— They've seen painted mules every day."

"If your brand was forgettable before, a new color won't fix it—just ask all the mules dyed to look like zebras."

"Our mule is vegan, organic, and pure, Sustainably sourced and morally sure. But values won't pull a cart up a hill— So best hire one that actually will."

"But, does the Mule carry the load? Free shipping builds more loyalty than any manifesto ever will."

"If everyone likes it, it's probably a horse in a Mule's job."

"A great brand story is like a mule—stubborn, reliable, and doesn't change just because you got bored."

"A Red mule is energetic, a blue mule is trustworthy….and customers are colour blind."

"Don't fuss….nobody remembers how a mule brays."

"If it needs an explanation, it's an essay, not a line."

"On A/B Testing: You are taking a chance on a chance."

"They vow to diet, skip the fries, To read more books and cut down lies. Yet cash in hand, the choice is clear— Desires shout, but habits steer."

"Focus groups exist to sand the edges off good ideas….until they are too safe to succeed."

"People answer wishfully."

"Asking people what they like is a great way to find out what they'll ignore later."

"Consumers lie. Because they're too polite to be honest."

"Your brand isn't what you call it. It's what they feel it is—A racehorse, a mule, or nothing at all."

"Your brand's not what you proudly shout, It's what they think when you're not about. A racehorse, mule—or worst of all… The name they just don't recall."

"A logo doesn't build a brand any more than a saddle makes a mule a racehorse."

"A name should click, be crisp and true—Not need a TED Talk to break through."

"Never spend a lot of time and energy in naming your mule…what you feed it will determine the load it carries."

"If it's clever, it probably isn't clear."

"Icons are made so that even Mules could understand. Being creative with icons is such an Ass idea."